Lately, things have not been good.

I don't wanna talk anymore.

I don't like today. I know it has only been a few hours into Monday but i hate it already. I woke up bright and early to a happy mood but things just took a turn a few minutes later.

Maybe because i expect too much. I shouldnt have had so much hope on something that wouldn't happen.

A shot or two would be good. Or three, or four or five.

This is a disaster

Yech, another 2 more weeks and it's officially common test time and i have yet to study anything at all. =S And i'm currently holding 3 Zoukout tickets. Don't know if i'm going since i'll be having some training the following morning at 9am( Zoukout ends at 8am!) and exam the next day. A friend of mine wants to get the tickets off me hands but i'm still so undecided. I've been looking forward to Zoukout since forever but there are so many factors pulling me away from it. We'll see how things go.

I went to Arena the other night. Had so much fun. Will do it again when exams are over.

Another day, another heartbreak.

I think i am the most spontaneous person ever. These past few days has been great but there were some mishaps here and there which i am sure i will live to regret. I don't like the fact that i am so impulsive to the point of making decisions that will affect the people surrounding me even if it is clear to me that the decision that i am making is wrong and the consequences are going to be drastic.

I don't like the fact that because of me, people are hurting all over. Be it because of my honest intentions or my impulsive nature. If i could turn back the time, all these shit wouldnt happen and everyone wouldn't feel so miserable right now. I should just stick to my contingency planning.

And oh the last post? Scratch that.

I've got a confession to make.

Hey boy, i think i'm starting to like you. I don't expect this from myself because i treat you like a friend and i thought that you were like all those men out there and starting having this negative feelings for you. But as time goes by, i realised that (at this point of time) you are better than the rest and definitely better than the last, but i'm kind of confused right now with so many things going on in my life what with my school work, my volunteer work and a whole lotta feelings that i have to deal with.

You see boy, the main problem with me is that i have feelings that are totally out of this world. No, they are not out of this world but i am the type of person who would feel the extreme points of each feelings be it i'm happy or sad, crazy or mad. And it doesn't help that i cannot seem to handle these feelings very well. I can go really ballistic over this. I'm up to my neck with all these crap.

We maybe good for each other but i think now is not the time to pursue anything personal. Just give me (maximum) 3 years to sort myself out because after i graduate, if the dust refuse to settle, i wanna leave and take some time out for myself. It'll be better for me, for you and for the rest. I need to think my life through.

Give me time boy. It's okay if you don't wanna wait for me. I know it'll hurt but it's gonna be alright in the end.