As told by me

Somebody naughty threw my water bottle away after finishing up my drink and for a few nights after that, when i wake up in the middle of the night thirsty, dehydrated and weak, i have to make my way alone to the kitchen for a cup of drink.

I wouldn't mind if the hall were well lit and cluster-free like East Coast Park, but noooo, the way to the kitchen is down one thousand and one flights of creaking wooden stairs, pass the creepy, spider-webby, narrow corridor of the guest rooms, and not only that, i have to find my way through a mazed-like walk-in storeroom with only a measly, dying candle in my hand.

Plus, the fire burning from the candle makes smiley faces-like shadows on my already rotting wall which never fails to make me shit in my pants while making my way to the kitchen.

And not only that, since smoke from the candle gives off CO2 which adds on to Global Warming (GLOBAL WARMING IS A MYTH), Mother only gives me half a candle stick which is to last me for a week since she knows about my frequent visits to the kitchen.

And if you think that i am being stupid for not turning on the lights, well think again because the main switches for the lights are placed strategically near the main entrance of the house which is the entrance that we rarely used mainly because of the exposed high voltages electricity cables and the live wires that are hanging out.

Now, y'all know why i never get any sleep? It's because i spent half of my sleeping hour making my way to and fro the anti-terrorist hall and not only that, i have to walk slowly to ensure that my candle don't die on me.

So think twice if you're thinking about having a sleep over or slumber party at my house unless of course, you're like my grandmother who knows not only Shaolin Kung fu, but Silat and Muay Thai too.

And not only that, my grandmother also makes the meanest asam pedas on earth too.